Life, but not as you know it.

This little post is to share with you all how saddening, maddening, frustrating, painful and tiring it is living with endometriosis and it's associated entourage of symptoms.

Every few weeks the pain gets so much that my body hits a wall of exhaustion and chronic fatigue sets it. I don't just mean tiredness like you have after a big night out, or even the wall of foggy sleep deprivation I felt when the twins were still night feeding.  No, this is a tiredness that makes my very bones ache. My glands come up, I feel sick with tiredness, my pain reaches a whole new level of attacking every nerve, sinew and muscle. My head aches, my whole body feels battered. Shattered. Broken.

Being broken to be re-built

I was explaining pregnancy to a lovely late 20's lady this weekend, which, after a few glasses of champers turned into a long regaling horror story much to her wide-eyed terror.

I concluded that motherhood, and adjusting to it, is like military training. You are completely and utterly broken in every way - physically, mentally, emotionally, hormonally, sleeplessly - and from there you can rebuild in your new life as a mum.

Asking for help; a learning curve

 

One of the hardest lessons I have been learning over the last few years is that asking for help is ok.

In fact, it's not only ok, it's often necessary, a relief to the person being asked, and down right easier all round.

Things that change when you have kids and why they don't matter

As you all know, I am the proud mumma to my Mini Divas, Eva and Mia.

Before I had the girls, in a previous life as a working, earning chick in London, my life could not be more different to how it is now. I was out most nights seeing friends, going to galleries, doing stuff. I would get cabin fever staying home for more than a night or two and I was rubbish at relaxing (as seen here).